2013 Land's End Trial

The Allard J1 at Wilsey Down Rest Halt. Everyone else has gone.

After being a non-starter in the Exeter due to illness (when Binky got the cold that I had before Christmas), Team Robert looked ahead with (even) extra enthusiasm to the Land's End. It proved cold but dry and we found a rare seam of form early on with a car going better than ever only for this unravel whilst waiting for Warleggan. Still we got going again, and made a big finish by cleaning first Blue Hills 1 then Blue Hills 2.

Binky (Mr Robert Robinson-Collins to you) had been fettling the Candidi Provocatore Allard J1 beforehand. New innovations included freshly greased leaf springs in the suspension, new plugs, new needle jet and the removal of the phenolic heat shield under the carb. A quick blast around the block before we set off and the car was pulling better than ever.

At Popham airfield, though, a headlamp wasn't working on dip and we had to take the lamp apart under a lamp post. The headlamp had not been apart for years and the bulb was okay so initially we were stumped but I waggled a few things and it began to work. A dry joint somewhere? Who knows? It worked and we were through scrutineering.

I was pleased to see the German crews again. Marc Shafer, Martin Watty, Thomas Pordzik and Enno Schmandt had come all the way from Bonn in Germany and slept the previous night in their support van and had got very cold. We saw them early on in the trial but as we were soon bringing up the rear I hope they finshed ahead of us.

There's was no Rodney's Revenge this year (who was Rodney anyway?), where we've always done well, but Hangman's Hill, which also posed no problems for us.

It was perishingly cold though. We told our German friends how we would be kept warm by 3.9 litre of flathead cast iron but those new plugs and ignition timing adjustments meant not only more beans but a cooler running running engine. My Hein Gericke motorcycle suit did a good job of keeping me warm but Binky wore just jeans and his special loafers. He did have gloves though. I find they're too cumbersome when I'm map reading.

One thing we might attend to for next time is a beefier tyre pump. The Allard's tubes take up a lot of volume and we settled on 14 psi bearing in mind how dry the sections were. It wasn't long before I was pumping them back up again in the headlamps of the course closing car.

It's surprising how impatient the cooling fan on a Fiat Panda can sound in the small hours.

We continued to make gentlemanly progress up Cutliffe Lane where I had to work as a bouncer for once. I could feel the more compliant suspension helping here and in the cold and sometimes freezing conditions the engine seemed to be running a lot happier without the phenolic spacer doing its heat shield thing.

Will and Stewart Couch were our running buddies until their rear axle got badly noisy after Sutcombe and they had to retire.

Darracott had featured a horrible re-start for us last year but proved no trouble this year. Crackington was particularly dry. Binky had been threatening to change up into second for the really fast blasts but in the end settled for first as the gear change is not that easy. Learning from our observations from last year, Binky pulled up low in the restart boxes and this strategy worked well.

Clear so far and full of optimism we were tooling along the A30 when Binky said "There's an Imp behind us". I turned and who should I see waving but my girlfriend Angela in her dad's Hillman Husky. She was driving down to Blue Hills from Oswaldtwistle in Lancashire - after an overnight stay at friends near Exeter - and when we stopped she said ours was the first trials car she'd seen on the road.

It was while we were waiting in the queue to tackle Warleggan that we lost our ignition. We'd made up a little time through cleaning all the hills so far but we were soon under the baleful gaze of that Fiat Panda again.

Gentlemen of the MCC assemble to assist us

Fortunately, our fellow competitors came to our aid. We shouldn't really be surprised but they didn't have to lend us a meter to prove there was no spark at the coil, ask how the rather patchy wiring worked, have a flash of genius to realise that by running a cable (which they also supplied) from the live terminal on the alternator to the starter switch and fuel pump we could get the plot going again and - finally - wiring it all in by lying in the footwell and putting in a bullet connector to serve as an impromptu off switch.

This is the improvised bullet connector on/off switch strapped to my grab handle. I had to be careful not to pull it apart when bouncing. The clothes peg on the dash is the choke adjustment.

Take a bow Duncan Pittaway (TVR V8S No.240)and David Walker (Reliant Scimitar SS1 No.241). Thank you very much indeed. Without your help we would probably've retired.

Duncan and David go, "Oh it was nothing really". Binky is delighted to still be in the trial

That rather put us off our stroke and we didn't get away from the restart on Warleggan. Hoskin foxed us, too, although with a run up we were able to get up okay afterwards. Lady Vale was tight on the turn but Binky squeezed the old warhorse through and Duncan and David were obviously overjoyed to see us back in the running when we entered Cardinham Woods.

Like Hoskin, the Bishop's Wood restart was in the red box for us and we couldn't get going again, although there were times when the Allard felt like its was going to just shrug itself over the step and we'd be on our way. Many times. many, many times. But it somehow didn't happen. We smoked the tyres good and proper on Bishop's Wood and by the time we'd reversed back down and aligned ourselves for the escape road there was still a fine display of sunbeams filtering through the bare branches of the wood and through our carbon tyre print.

"We couldn't see you at all!" said one of the marshals.

By the time we got to Blue Hills we were 3 hours behind our expected arrival time of 1530. Ange was still there on the hill despite being, by now, marrow cold. Straight away she fell into conversation with - of all people  - Roger and Caroline Ugalde who kindly returned to look after her as everyone else drifted away and the sun began to set.

We'd climbed Blue Hills 1 once before many years ago when we borrowed the Allard from Roger but had never quite managed Blue Hills 2. The approach to Blue Hills 1 was very wet and looked doctored to us. The turn out is very tight and we had to ensure we stopped across the section ends line.

Somehow it all came good. We got the tyres sticky, Binky trickled back on the juice and eased the Allard round the corner. I had to ask the marshals if we'd cleaned it - we were so surprised. A congratulatory thumb on the back for the driver, who modestly reckoned it was my bouncing that got us out of that one, and we were up the hill as the last competitor to tackle Blue Hills 2.

The sun wasn't quite in our eyes so we couldn't use that excuse for failure. Binky kept the car low on the yellow restart box and in front of our adoring public - well Angela and the Ugaldes - we cleaned Blue Hills in toto for the first time.

Ange covered almost a thousand miles in her dad's Husky

So we finished on a high.There was s light hiccup on the way to the sign off at the Penhale Round because Ange's Husky lost its electrics and she doesn't know the area and it was getting dark by then. Fortunately, she fixed it and got going again, although as potential rescuers we did have a bit of a run around.

So no award but getting up Blue Hills was the realisation of a long standing ambition for me.